Happen to grew up in a Christian family, so Christianity was just part of my identity from the start. But honestly? It felt more like something I inherited than something I actually believed in. I went through the motions – reading the Bible, praying, and attending church – mainly to keep my parents happy and fit in with my community.
For years, I was just checking off the boxes. My heart wasn’t in it. Over time, the pressure to keep up the religious act felt exhausting. I started questioning everything – especially God’s existence. Eventually, I gave up trying so hard and kind of drifted into this agnostic mindset. I wasn’t sure if God was real, and to be honest, I stopped caring.
Then life threw some really hard stuff my way. I was completely overwhelmed, and my mind felt like it was stuck in this dark, lonely place. That’s when my dad shared a verse from the Bible with me. He said, “ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.”* (Matthew 6:26).
I don’t know what it was, but that verse hit me differently. It wasn’t just words anymore – it felt personal. It felt like God was talking straight to me, reminding me that He cared, even when I felt invisible.
That moment changed everything. Suddenly, the Bible wasn’t just this old book full of rules – it started to feel alive. I began to talk to God, not in rehearsed prayers but real conversations. And as I did, I realized I didn’t need to try so hard to be perfect or religious. I just needed to let God love me.
What I Learned: Relationship Over Religion
If there’s one big takeaway from my story, it’s this – religion can only take you so far. Real change happens when you stop trying to impress God and start actually knowing Him.
Jesus even said in John 15:15, “I no longer call you servants… Instead, I have called you friends.” God doesn’t want robots who follow rules; He wants friends who know Him personally.
So if you’re feeling stuck or weighed down by religious expectations, maybe it’s time to take a step back. James 4:8 says, “Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.”* It’s not about performing – it’s about connecting.
Final Thoughts
Looking back, I’m actually thankful for the struggles I faced. Without them, I might have stayed stuck in religion and missed out on the relationship God wanted to have with me.
Now, I live in the peace of knowing I’m loved – not because I checked all the right boxes but because God is my Father, and I’m His child. And that’s what really matters.
If you’re searching for something real, I’d encourage you to start there. Talk to God, even if it feels awkward at first. You might be surprised by how much He’s been waiting to talk to you too.
Post written by Priyanka Martin